02/12/05 Morning before sculpture nervous. I have been watching lots of porn and masturbating frequently this week. Today’s piece I will be in the same position I began these ideas, sitting holding my penis: all the porn, back to frustration, beginning to grow out.
f was bound and still waiting for others to act on me before twisting out of my self imposed bonds.
L was me all over myself a sticky wrapped up mess that turned from f and began to worship, something anything other than me, a tribute to art of the past, then peeling out of myself imposed mess. Between the experiences, I brought my living space to the art space and in route because “broken” by the police, outside forces, authority, ignorance, fear, and aggression.
O is alone, no friends to help, no ties, sitting alone, and holding my frustrated masturbation. Others may work on me I don’t know.